


Scar Tissue

by impossibleyears



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, slight!changki, slight!hyungwonho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-08-09 12:54:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7802638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impossibleyears/pseuds/impossibleyears
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'll leave today, because there's nothing left to keep me here."</p>
<p>somewhat of a songfic? cross posted to wattpad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

Why did he leave?

The question that haunts six men, some keeping it in the back of their minds as they continue about their day, while for others it consumes their thoughts, their day dedicated to this question.

~~

{say it ain't so- weezer}  
Lim Changkyun was part of the latter. Childhood friends with Yoo Kihyun, he was the first to find out he was gone. He refused to believe he wasn't here, simply not accepting it and continuing to text him as if nothing had happened. But deep down, he knew.

He'd go as long as he could not accepting this fact. Changkyun had been harboring a crush for Kihyun for as long as he's known him, and he was not going to accept his disappearance that easily.

His heart slowly was breaking, a piece chipping off as each day without Kihyun ended. Not only had he lost his best friend, he lost the one he loved in another way.

i miss you.

~~

{santeria-sublime}  
Lee Minhyuk, was possibly the polar opposite of Changkyun in this situation. Only knowing Kihyun as a frequent customer in the coffee shop where he worked, and a partner for a project in school on one occasion, the disappearance of Kihyun hadn't really dehabilitated him.

Of course he missed him, Kihyun was fun to talk to, and it was weird to not hear from him anymore, but Minhyuk wasn't one to dwell over something for too long.

what happened?

~~

{otherside-red hot chill peppers}  
Son Hyunwoo was completely ruined by Kihyun going missing. Hyunwoo missed him every day, slowly slipping into depression as day after day passed by.

Hyunwoo had been dating Kihyun, so the sudden absence of the love of his life had taken its toll. Hyunwoo hadn't taken it well, blaming himself for everything, spending all his free time wondering if maybe, just maybe, he'd said he loved him just a little more, he wouldn't have left.

He missed Kihyun so much. It was terrifying not knowing where he was. What had happened? He didnt know, and he was scared to find out. All he hoped was that wherever Kihyun was, he was happy.

is it my fault?

~~

{don't speak-no doubt}  
Chae Hyungwon was indifferent to the situation of Kihyun, but only because he found it hard to express his emotions. Inside, he was scared. He was so scared.

Kihyun was the only person Hyungwon talked to out of his reserved nature. He would consider Kihyun his best friend, and without him here, he was back to being alone. It wasn't too hard to adjust to being alone again, but he missed Kihyun. He lost his only friend, and it was unusual having no one to talk to anymore, but Hyungwon wasn't going to let anyone know that.

why did you have to go?

~~

{heart shaped box-nirvana}  
Shin Hoseok became friends with Yoo Kihyun to get closer to Hyungwon. He'd ask for Kihyun for advice to talk to the quiet man, and Kihyun gave it to him, with a knowing smile and a sweet voice.

Hoseok had become so used to talking to Kihyun, suddenly not seeing him had been an unwelcome surprise. Kihyun was his support system, he was there to give him hope. And now that he was gone, Hoseok had returned to admiring Hyungwon from afar, who seems to have gotten quieter since Kihyun had disappeared. But Hoseok was too afraid to talk to Hyungwon, especially after Kihyun had gone.

where did you go?

~~

{kryptonite-3 doors down}  
Lee Jooheon was friends with both everyone and no one. He never managed to speak with Kihyun though, and he regretted it to an extent. He didn't think much about it, but he wanted to have a conversation with Kihyun.

He didn't think about it much, Jooheon simply continued on his way, talking to whoever would listen, but it would nag in the back of his mind, that he never got the chance to get to Yoo Kihyun.

i'm sorry we never got to get closer.

~~

Changkyun had made the ultimate decision, but he was going to gather everyone who had some personal connection to Kihyun, to hopefully get some closure.

He first found Hyunwoo, after school he ran up to his senior (whom he knew was dating Kihyun) and introduced himself. He explained his idea, and after Hyunwoo agreed to gather everyone he knew that was connected to Kihyun personally, they agreed to meet in the park that following Saturday.  
,,

Changkyun had found Jooheon after class one day, noticing that since Kihyun had disappeared, he seemed less eager to speak to people.

In the end, Changkyun was right about Jooheon being connected to Kihyun, so he tagged along with him.

He also managed to find Minhyuk, as he knew of Kihyun's frequenting of the coffee shop.  
,,

While Changkyun found Jooheon and Minhyuk, Hyunwoo found Hyungwon and Hoseok, in nearly the same place.

He'd found Hyungwon reading under a tree and quickly explained the situation, and after Hyungwon quietly agreed, Hyunwoo noticed Hoseok watching at a picnic table a little ways down. He walked up to him and asked if he knew Kihyun, and the minute he answered 'yes', Hyunwoo had shook his hand and told him to be at the park on Saturday at six pm.  
,,

At the park it was best decided they all introduce themselves and their connection to Yoo Kihyun.

Changkyun began;

"I'm Lim Changkyun, Kihyun's best friend since we were kids."

Hyunwoo decided to continue, in the same manner as Changkyun.

"I'm Son Hyunwoo, Kihyun's boyfriend."

The other's continued in more or less the same way;

"My name is Lee Minhyuk, acquaintance and classmate of Kihyun,"

"Chae Hyungwon, Kihyun is really my only friend."

"Shin Hoseok, Kihyun gave me advice on occasion."

And finally, "I'm Lee Jooheon, I never really knew Yoo Kihyun, but I wish I did."  
,,

The six began to talk throughout the week, finding no clues as to where Kihyun is, nor any closure.

So, as a last ditch effort, they all pitch in and write a letter to Kihyun. It was a silent agreement between most of the group that Changkyun take the letters to Kihyun's apartment, because of the amount of time Changkyun had known Kihyun.  
,,

Changkyun was surprised that he was to leave the letters at Kihyun's, he was sure Hyunwoo would be a better choice, but he decided it was best not to argue the point.

So that weekend, Changkyun leaves the letter at Kihyun's doorstep, not having a key. As he walks away, he looks back and makes a final, silent wish that one day Kihyun returns to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a fic I wrote on wattpad so the format might be messy, apologies!! I'm working on figuring out the format for ao3 so please bare with me! ;;


	2. 2

{above and below-the bravery}  
Why did Kihyun disappear? Well, to put it simply, he wanted adventure.

He left because there wasn't anything new to discover. He had friends, and even a boyfriend, yet it didn't seem like enough. So, he decided to 'run away'.

He does feel bad about not leaving any warning however, so he sets a date where he'll return to pick up anything he might need, or anything left for him.

But as the day approaches closer, Kihyun passes the time by backpacking through towns to see how they differ from where he came from. Kihyun finds things that he didn't know existed before, and he enjoys it. He lives for discovering new things, he's rarely ever bored since he's always doing something, or planning to do something.

The reason he left was because his own hometown became boring. Waking up to the same ceiling every morning was boring, and Kihyun didn't like boring.

So he left.

But here he is, sitting in the back of a taxi cab in the dead of night, catching a ride back 'home'. He gave himself only 24 hours to stay in the town and to give closure to the people that could've missed him.

He walks up the steps to his apartment and before opening the door to enter, he notices a small stack of papers under his feet. Kihyun reaches down and picks them up, smiling when he recognizes a couple of the names on the papers. Kihyun enters his house and settles into the couch, and opens up the first letter, from a man he knows as his best friend.

Kihyun,  
I've been wondering why you left for weeks, it consumes all of my thoughts. I've talked to so many people, and I still don't have closure. I just want to know if you're safe and happy, that's all I want. I miss you Kihyun.

-Changkyun

Kihyun begins feeling a little guilty after reading the letter. He makes a note to himself that he'll let Changkyun know he's okay before he leaves for good.

The next letter is from a name he associates with warmth and happiness.

Kihyun, my angel,  
I miss you so much. I'm sorry if I caused this, I really am. I'm sorry that I wasn't enough, but I hope that all you feel now is happiness, you deserve it. Please let me know if I did anything to cause this, and if I did, I apologize.

-Hyunwoo

After reading that letter, Kihyun feels a pang of regret in his chest. He feels as if he hurt Hyunwoo, which was the least of his intentions. But nonetheless, he continues on to the next letter.

Kihyun,  
I kind of miss you, I'm not going to lie. I miss taking your order every day, even though I have it memorized. I miss the conversations we had. They were fun, I wish we could have more. But what happened, what caused you to want to leave? I'm asking because I kind of miss you a lot.

-Minhyuk

Kihyun finds himself smiling sadly after reading what Minhyuk had left him. He feels his eyes water as he continues onto the next message left for him.

Kihyun,  
I have nothing to say. I'm not mad at you, but you're my best friend, really the only person I talk to enough to consider a friend, and I miss you. Why did you leave? I'm alone now, just as I was before I met you. I don't mind, not many people want to stay with someone who doesn't have much to offer towards conversation.

-Hyungwon

After this, the tears are staining his cheeks, but Kihyun doesn't care enough to wipe them away. He just moves on to the next in the stack.

Hey,   
First of all, thank you. Your advice is very helpful, and I'm happy that you offered your time to a boy hopelessly in love. But where did you go? Without my support system, it's hard to apply the advice you gave me. I'll keep trying though, for you.

-Hoseok

Kihyun realizes how many people really miss him after reading Hoseok's letter. It's a bittersweet feeling, really, to know you caused this much heartache unknowingly. He sees there's one final envelope left in the stack, with a name he doesn't recognize. He opens it and reads it silently.

Kihyun,  
I know you don't know me, I don't know you either. The thing is, I wish I did. You have this beauty and this approachable feeling around you and I wish I got the chance to talk to you. I can't say that I miss you, because I don't have anything to miss. I can say, however, that I miss passing you in the hallways. I want to be your friend, but I'm afraid that I lost the chance.

-Jooheon

This is what pushes Kihyun past the breaking point. Someone he didn't even know missed him? He found it flattering, but it was also a wake up call to see that there's more to life than constantly seeking adventure.

Kihyun realizes that not only was he missed, but that he missed his friends too. So he takes his phone out of his pocket, (it was rendered useless since he lost service out of the city) and after turning it on, he texts Changkyun.

From: Kihyun   
[10:28]  
Hey. I'm back, get all of my friends together and tell them to meet me in the park around seven.

After this, he texts Hyunwoo, just to let him know he's okay.

From: Kihyun  
[10:31]  
I love you so much. I've returned, none of it's your fault, in fact it's mine. I just wanted to let you know I love you, and I understand if you're mad at me after this.

,,  
Kihyun arrives at the park at seven o'clock sharp. He gets out of his car and sees familiar faces looking out for him, all sitting around a picnic table.

When he gets to the table, he's taken aback that no ones mad at him. In fact he's being hugged tearfully, a chorus of 'I missed you' and 'I love you' being said all at once.

After they've all settled into the picnic table, Kihyun first sees Jooheon. He's sitting at the end of the table, looking out of place, as he's not looking at him. Kihyun gets up and walks over to him, engulfing him in a hug.

"Hey Jooheon, I'm Yoo Kihyun." He smiles, after pulling away.

"Um, hey Kihyun, I'm Lee Jooheon." Jooheon smiles sheepishly.

"I hope we can be better friends!" Kihyun is grinning, and Jooheon finds the corners of his mouth curling upwards.

"But, I'm really sorry that I left without saying anything, I'm young and seeking adventure, and frankly, I got bored of this town." Kihyun turns back towards the others at the table.

"That's understandable, I was just scared because you never said anything to anyone." Hyunwoo speaks up, not a hint of malice in his voice.

"I know, and I'm sorry, I didn't realize how much worry I would cause." He looks down, voice shaking slightly.

"Hey, Kihyun, don't sweat it alright? You're fine, we don't hate you, and I don't think we ever will." Changkyun says, standing up to comfort his best friend.   
,,

That night, Kihyun packs up the letters and a couple other belongings before sending a text to the people that he'll miss most.

From: Kihyun  
[21:56]  
Thank you guys for everything. I'll text you whenever I can.

And the next day, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed my writing :P

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on wattpad so I apologize for formatting errors, I'm still figuring out how ao3 works ;; 
> 
> this is kinda based off of the song Above and Below by The Bravery, but the other songs mentioned kind of fit each individual member's feelings, if you understand. I hope you enjoy!


End file.
